Wednesday 21 May 2014

Not such good news this time.

Today (21/05) I had another pre-chemotherapy oncology consultation and my PSA has fallen again but not as dramatically, it's down from 98 to 94. At least it's in the right direction.

The title of the last entry, it turns out, is incorrect. It's not only one or two of my readers who were wrong about the total number of chemo sessions, I've been wrong too. It's not six or as I thought, eight sessions, it is in fact ten so the next one (two days hence) is actually the halfway point. It's a bit of a blow as I'd believed I was halfway through.

Still, to temper that disappointment, there's more.

Just before my second chemo session, the nurse was checking my file when she said that there was something she needed to check before starting the procedure. She was gone for a while, when she returned and I asked what the problem was she told me that my blood test revealed an issue with my kidney function but that it was okay to continue the chemo session.

Last week I had a CT scan and today it was confirmed that a cancerous node is affecting one of my kidneys, preventing it draining properly. If allowed to continue it will lead to damage of the kidney.

The intention is to insert a stent to keep the kidney open and draining but first there will be a nephrostomy. This is a cannula inserted into the kidney via the small of the back to allow it to drain. That means a bag for as long as it takes, possibly several weeks, to ensure the kidney is drained fully. Once that's done there will be an operation to insert a stent to keep it open.

I'll admit to not being too surprised about there being an issue. I had thought that it was likely after the second chemo session and the question about my kidney function. Although it is bit of a backward step it's not as bad as the worst possible scenario; the cancer getting into my kidneys or other organs.

Probably the worst thing is that in the past ten days or so I've felt so much better with more energy than I've felt for months, possibly even the past year. This feels, at present, with the news so fresh, something of a few steps backwards. I dare say that as I assimilate the information and get used to the idea of more medical intervention, it will seem less of a retrograde step. Even just setting things down here is something of a catharsis.

So, I'm set for chemo number five on Friday afternoon. I'll be hydrating myself between now and then in the hope that it makes inserting the cannula easier and steeling myself for the inevitable effects within twenty-four hours.

Talking of which, an odd thing happens when the loss of taste buds is at its worst, I find myself fantasising about all sorts of food, usually things that I haven't eaten for years. It can almost become obsessive. Recently and this is a bit of a coincidence, I found that I was thinking about devilled kidneys! This wasn't so bad when I knew that it was pointless eating because everything tastes the same (uniformly disgusting) but as the taste sensation returned (it never fully recovers) I set off on a hunt only to discover that my preferred pig's kidneys seem to be out of fashion these days. Well that only added to the desire. Yesterday I found a butcher with some and I shall feast upon them this evening. It seems somehow fitting to dine upon devilled kidneys today!


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